IWT Wrap Party - In Wollongong Tonight

In Wollongong on a Friday night the IWT cast had their wrap party. All you favourite IWT stars and Luke were there. Well nearly all your favourite stars. Kam no showed after saying he was coming down but sent Number One fan Browny in his place to drink beer, have some BBQ and accept any prizes he won on his behalf. Another invited special guest that had something better to do then try and break a camera piñata at Pat’s place on Friday night was future Dragons Immortal Ben Creagh but apparently he had to go to Queensland and beat the Broncos so I’ll let it slide. It was probably a good thing that he wasn’t at the party as there was free beer and girls around and we all know how well NRL Superstars, beer and girls work together.

With everyone else there it was time to hand out the coveted Worker Of The Season Award as Lara Freestone had her named etched into time and a trophy as the fourth season winner. The prize for such a grand win: Getting to be the cast member who smashed open the piñata with a cricket bat, there was no blind fold but alcohol is the great equaliser - especially when Pat has spun you around with your eyes shut. Speaking of big winners Frank Csapo walked away with the award for Sketch Of The Season for True Wollongong Stories and had a poster signed by Pat, Dan, Tucker and myself. Sure the rest of the cast scribbled their names as well but who gives a damn if Luke signed it. Tucker and I did and that’s all that matters really.

The night went off without any problems. The fight between Dan A and Trent never eventuated as they were both in street clothes and not ready to fight, Pat didn’t name any awards after himself and I got my arm around every female in the cast one last time (And went 0 for 6 on the night. Who am I the Manly Sea Eagles?*) Because there’s a chance the only people reading this are those that were there who are skimming it to see if I mention them or you’re Kam interested to see what gongs you picked up, here’s the complete IWT Awards:

Nailed It Award for Best Delivery: Michael Payne- “I made these drawings for you.”

Australia’s Got Talent Award: Mark Williamson for doing all the original music for Season Four.

Granite Face for Holding in Laughter Award: Suzanne McGavin.

Whose Line Is It Anyway for Best Improvised Line: Kamuran Musker- “I’m being Scotty Sheppard about this, you should be Scotty Sheppard about this too.”

The So Long Dignity Award: Daniel Stawanski for the speedos scene.

Born for the Role Award: Frank Csapo as a taxi driver.

Worst Excuse for Not Filming Award: Dan Auld for “I have to shop for TVs with my mum.”

Running on Csapo Time (Late) Award: Patrick Williamson.

Workers Compensation Award: Kamuran Musker for dropping a table on his toe.

Filming Hung Over Award: Lara Freestone.

Forgot Something Award: Patrick Williamson for forgetting Mark.

Jizz In My Pants Award: Getting Dan A, Kam and Payney together to film Gnome Means Gnome.

Dogged It Award For Pulling Out Of Filming: Dan Auld for not doing the speedos scene.

King of Wasting Tape Award: Kamuran Musker.

The Osama Bin Laden Award for Hardest to Track Down: Kamuran Musker

Garthed It Award for Freezing Up: Dan Auld.

Busiest Person With Nothing To Do Award: Michael Payne for “Hurry up I have to go play X Box and watch DVDs with Frank.”

Slapstick/ Physical Comedy Award: Lara Freestone for high kicks in ACT neighbours at war.

Evil Villain Award: Anna Kelly as Shane Warne’s Mum.

Create An Award for Cast Members Who Haven’t Won Anything Yet: Trent Boncompagni, Luke Boncompagni and Jane Williamson.

So everyone was a winner at the IWT Wrap Party - even Mark and for the most part he’s useless! Lara was awarded the Worker of the Season. Trent captained the winning trivia team. Browny may just keep the prize Kam won for himself so he’s a winner. No one punched Dan. Win. Pat was the centre of attention as IWT quiz master and reading out the award nominees so he’s good. The Dragons beat the Broncos so Creagh is a winner and I got my arm around six of the girls including one whose boyfriend was there and three who are Williamsons so I’m classing that as a win. There’s a fine line between winning and losing.

The only loser in all this is the Australian television industry who won’t see us In Wollongong Tonight.

*This joke worked when I wrote it before Stewart returned. So just insert whoever is on the bottom of the table of your chosen sport at the time you read this.